


AJ Speedle

by ToxicAngel13



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, CSI: Miami, NCIS
Genre: Crime Scenes, Feels, Kid Fic, M/M, Starting Over, Wishes, Witness Protection, new life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-05
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2017-12-10 10:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/785250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToxicAngel13/pseuds/ToxicAngel13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Buffy goes to far Dawn wishes Xander away, into a new life with new challenges and adventures. One little word changes many people's worlds as someone thought dead returns and relationships begin again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Alright Lovelies. I warned you that the Archive of Doom was opening up. This story is crawling from it's depths, eager to see the light of Day. It's also an older one that I am re-editing as I post so bear with me.
> 
> Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own any of the characters I use. I'm just borrowing them, and I promise I'll return them with only the minimum wear and or tear.

              “I wish Xander had a way better life with people who actually cared for him. With people who love him and notice that he’s special, that he’s smart- like genius smart. I wish he never had to want for anything again, and more than anything I wish he was so far away from you and Willow, so you two could never hurt him with your actions again!” Dawn screamed hysterically, waving her hands in a gesture towards the bed behind her.

                Xander was lying in the hospital bed beat up. It wasn’t from a vampire, demon, or even his abusive parents this time. No Buffy had put her pseudo brother there when she found out about the lie. Sure she acted like she cared now that he almost died from the beating she’d given him, but it was unlikely. Dawn knew she shouldn’t have used the word wish, but she was desperate to finally save Xander from the life he was living, from the repeating cycles of abuse. She wanted him to finally have something better in life then second best like always. He was her hero, and he didn’t deserve anything that he had gotten in life.

                “Wish granted.” A soft voice declared immediately, as her voice died down. Xander disappeared and Buffy looked at her like she had just committed murder. Dawn smiled at the bed, not noticing the look she was getting immediately. It had worked, Xander was going to have a better life than the one he had here- she was sure of it.

                “Oh my god Dawn, what have you done? You wished him away. We might not be able to get him back.” Buffy shrieked. Dawn ignored her theatrics before looking at the ceiling, inhaling shakily.

                “Good luck Xan.” She whispered, hoping he was enjoying life wherever he was and that the people who got him took good care of him, and knew just how special he was.


	2. Chapter 2

              Calleigh sighed angrily as she looked over the crime-scene with distaste, she knew she shouldn't judge the victem's but sometimes it was hard not to. The apartment was obviously neglected and used for a meeting place for sexual activities if the condom wrappers and sexual toys were to be judged by. The victim had been attacked in her own home if she understood everything correctly. But that wasn't what she was angry about, not even a little.

              She sighed again; she knew this was going to be a hard case to work. 26 year old Antonia Lavelle was a known prostitute, and honestly it looked like a transaction gone wrong from the scene itself, but she tried not to draw a conclusion until all the evidence was in. The john might have gotten rough and accidently killed her before running, or it could be a hit for all she knew right now. What disturbed Calleigh the most at the moment, was the children’s toys so casually strewn along with the sexual implements, raising a child like this just wasn’t right. The trauma this woman had inflicted on the child she was raising was unexcusable.

             The landlord had informed them that Antonia had a four year old son named Alexander. Said child was nowhere to be found. The boy’s father was unknown, and none of the neighbors had seen the kid since he had gotten home from preschool the previous day. That was long before Antonia’s Time Of Death. The case was turning uglier by the minute if the child had been taken after the mother was killed any number of things could be happening to him as they worked the scene. Ignoring her own personal feelings she went back to collecting evidence- it wasn’t up to her to judge the woman, but she would have never raised her child like this and she didn’t know how someone could period.

* * *

 

              Alex murmured as she took in the poor baby’s body. The child may have sold herself for money, but she hadn’t deserved to die like this. She’d been crying out for help, but nobody had heard her. As she moved around the body she took pictures, making sure to get every detail. She was so immersed in her work that she almost didn’t hear the shifting noises over the noise of the flash going off as she worked. Almost being the key word. She froze and looked around trying to figure out what could be making the noise, before looking at the victim, trying to see if she held some sort of clue.

             Antonia’s arm was stretched towards the wall, so Alexx moved closer, looking over the wall closely. What had the baby girl gone down trying to reach?  She froze as she saw a lock, almost unnoticible, but definaly holding something closed. She scooted closer and put her ear to the door that was now clear once she’d taken a closer look. Shallow, frightened breathing greeted her sharp ears and she closed her eyes, fighting the urge to curse as she realized that the missing child was most likely locked in there, where he had heard everything that had happened to his mother.

             “Hold on baby boy, help’s here. We're going to get you out of there.” She murmured in a soothing tone before looking up, trying to find someone.

             “Eric! Calleigh! Horatio! Ryan! We need bolt cutters or a key. I think I found the baby boy! He sounds like he’s in shock!” She announced as loudly as she dared- she didn’t want to scare him any more than he had to be right now, before turning back to the door and moving closer again. She put a hand on the wood, as if she could comfort him with her presence alone. God only knew how long he’d been in there and what he had heard.

              “Alex, do you like being called Alex baby? If you can understand me knock once.” She murmured, trying to make some sort of contact with the child. It seemed like forever before there was a knock, soft and hesitent but there all the same. She smiled triumphantly.

               “Good Alex. I’m Ale…xx and we’re going to get you out of there so don’t be scared.” She instructed as Eric appeared with bolt cutters. She took them and snapped the lock before carefully opening the door. The smell of urine and feces greeted the two investigators, along with the panicked whimpers of a child as it moved to the furthest corner from them. Alexx made soothing noises low in her throat, knowing after everything that the little boy was probably terrified of them.

                “Shh baby boy, we’re not here to hurt you. I’m Alex remember?” She murmured, her voice low and calm. Suddenly she found herself with an armful of a too small four year old boy who was sobbing his little heart out into her shoulder. She hugged him securely, letting him know that he was safe in her arms and that she wasn’t letting him go, not moving for a couple of minutes just to let him get used to her touch.

                  “That’s it baby. You’re safe now.” She murmured standing up. She walked straight to the bathroom, which had been processed before setting her bundle on the sink. Carefully she tipped his face up and gasped. A replica of her dear Speedy’s face was staring at her with blank eyes. They were a beautiful dark green. Eric gasped behind her as he noticed his resemblance to their dead friend and she looked up at him, their eyes connecting.

                   “He looks like him.” Eric murmured, his voice thick. Alexx nodded, hardly able to breathe.

                   “I know Eric. Get Horatio in here while I collect the any evidence off of him. I want to take Alex to the hospital to make sure he hasn’t been hurt, and to treat the shock.” She ordered gently, before the lab tech could break down at the reminder of their three year old dead co-worker.  She began taking photo’s and collecting swabs and samples, moving slowly and keeping a reassuring look on her face as she did. Eric nodded and left, before coming right back. Horatio had followed them. He looked at the child gently, his eyes misting, before nodding

                    “Go ahead Alexx. I’ll have Lavelle’s body sent to the morgue once we’re done processing.” He agreed. Alexx picked up her little Lexxie. Even if the tests showed he wasn’t Speedy’s there was no way she was letting him go to anyone else but the family. She nodded, cooing slightly as her bundle fidgeted.

                   “Come on Lexxie-baby.” She murmured, leaving the scene of his mother’s murder behind her, an assistant already taking over where she left off.


	3. Chapter 3

     “He has a severe case of malnutrition, and he’s in shock. That withstanding he’s in pretty good shape, a little thin and a little shy but I think he’s going to be okay” The doctor informed Alexx gently. She sighed looking at the wall over his shoulder. The more she was around that baby the more she say her Speed in him.

                “Poor baby’s been through a lot. Not just with what happened to his mama either. We’ll need his clothes for evidence.” She murmured, looking into the room, at the sleeping child. He looked so peaceful right now, and she almost smiled. The Doctor nodded- pointing to a bag in the corner of the room- it was already sealed.

                “His clothes are right there. I’ve called child services, they’ll be here when we release him and he’ll get a good home, somewhere where he’ll forget about what happened.” He informed her. She swung around, her eyes flashing as she looked at him. Her chest was swelling with anger even as she knew he was just doing his job.

                “We’re running a paternity test Doctor Michaels. If we’re correct as to whom his father is, or even if we’re not then we still plan on keeping him.” She replied steadily. He frowned at her reaction, a look telling her he disproved of her words clear in his eyes and she bit back a frown of her own. She knew she was in the wrong.

                  “Alexx, I know you care for each and every person you see, but that’s not how things work. I had to call Social Services. He’s malnourished, he heard his mother die, he has no father on record, and he has no relatives he can go to. I’m sure you’ll have a chance to get him through the proper channels.” He replied, his voice gentle still. Alexx bit back a frown again and nodded, knowing that they would have to do this the right way. It wasn’t as simple as declaring Lexxie thiers and expecting everyone to agree. She sighed, it looked like she was going to be a foster mother soon- she’d already been approved to do it once in the past.

                  “Of course. I should get this to the lab.” She replied, motioning to the clothes and the vial of blood that she was going to run against Speed’s DNA, before looking at Lexxie again. “Call me if he wakes up. I’ll help you guys keep the baby-boy calm.” She added, a concerned note tinting her voice. Dr. Michaels nodded.

                   “Of course Alexx. Alexander seems to have bonded with you. It will look good when you try and get custody of him, I promise.” He replied. She nodded, before heading out, forcing herself not to stop and look at the sleeping child again, because if she did she wouldn’t want to  leave him all alone here.

* * *

 

               Horatio looked up as Alexx entered the labs. She had a vial of blood in her hand, along with the bag of clothes the little boy who looked so much like his lover had been wearing. He nodded to her and she handed the vial over to the tech in front of him. The tech took it, before looking to her for instruction.

               “I need a paternity test to determine a victim’s father. Run it against Timothy Speedle.” She ordered, her voice steady and wavering at the same time. The tech looked at her confused, but nodded not questioning her as to why she was having him run it against a dead man, going to work. She sighed and turned to Horatio.

                “The baby boy has a case of severe malnutrition. It wasn’t the result of his overnight stay in that cupboard either. Antonia wasn’t taking care of him very well. Dr. Michaels told me he’ll call when he wakes up so I can head down there and keep him calm.” She reported, her voice husky. Horatio frowned at her report.

                “I see. Did you get his clothing size by chance? The clothes at Ms. Lavelle’s have been taken for evidence, and by their state he’ll need to have new ones.” He replied, his own voice sounding off. She nodded shortly.

                “He’s still in toddler 3.” She replied softly. He nodded again, writing it down.

                 “I’ll send Calleigh to get him a couple outfits when she goes on her lunch break. When does him come home?” he asked seriously, not even mentioning him going anywhere other than to them. Alexx sighed, if the baby was Speed's Horatio was going to be there ever step of the way, since the man he loved couldn’t be.

                 “Michaels called Child services. It was his duty. We’ll have to go through the system to get him permantly. Other than that he’s looking at a 3 day stay there.” She replied softly. He sighed, looking away.

                “I thought so. Calleigh will still pick him up some clothing.” He replied, his voice determined. She smiled softly before nodding and then sighing again.

                “I guess I better get to the baby girl in the morgue and see what she has to say for herself. Especially if I want to be able to be there when the baby wakes up.” She replied before leaving him to his thought.

* * *

 

                Alexx was finishing up the autopsy; Antonia had died due to strangulation, asphyxiation pure and simple. She hadn’t used a condom with the last John, so they had DNA for a suspect. Suddenly her phone rang, making her jump a little at the break in her silence. She took her gloves off before she picked it up.

                “Alexx Woods.” She murmured, taking her eyes off Alexander’s mother.

                “Alexx, this is Dr. Michaels. Alexander is waking up, he’s still asleep, so you might be able to make it up here before he’s fully awake if you hurry.” Lexxie’s Doctor informed her. She nodded, already taking off her gowns and heading to wash up. There was no way she was leaving that baby alone in the hospital for long.

                “I have to finish up here, and then I’ll be right there. The baby-boy won’t wake up alone.” She assured him. She could almost hear his smile as he laughed a little.

                “I think you won’t have a problem getting custody when you try for it. You have a stable job, and you’re perfect mother material.” He assured her, almost like he felt bad for her having to go through the legal hoops when it was obvious she cared for the child under his care. She smiled to herself.

                “Thanks you. I’ll see you in a couple of minutes” She replied, before hanging up. There was a knock on her domain’s entrance. She looked up and sighed as she saw Horatio standing there, looking pale.

                “The Results are in, I had the lab put a rush on the DNA comparison. Alexander James Lavelle is Alexander James Speedle.” He reported. Alexx felt her eyes tear up at the confirmation of Lexxie’s parentage. Her Speedy had a baby-boy he’d never know about, one that she would make sure was taken care of from now on.

                “I thought so. The hospital just called, Lexxie is waking up. I’m done with his mother, so I’m going.” She said, her voice cracking, and all she wanted to do was go.  Horatio nodded, looking as good as she felt.

                “Go make sure he’s alright. Speed might not be able to take care his son, but we can.” He replied. She nodded and then she was gone. She had to make sure her grandbaby was alright, and wouldn’t wake up scared.

* * *

 

                Dr. Micheals smiled as Alexx walked in. She gave a small smile in return, her eyes still red from the crying she had done on the way over, before heading over to the bed. Lexxie was awake, but had his eyes closed and was curled in a ball. He was pretending he wasn’t there and she sighed at the cruelness of the world. Speed would have loved to be here for this little one, but her adoptive son had been taken away far too soon.

                “Hey Lexxie-baby.” She murmured, keeping her voice steady. His arm moved slightly and she saw a green eye looking at her, before the arm moved and she saw the heartbreakingly familiar face fully, his little mouth quirking into an all too familiar smile.

                “Alexx!” She heard him squeak. She smiled as he looked around and pouted.

                “Can I go wid you? Dis is a scary place.” He whimpered suddenly, his eyes tearing up. She smiled at him gently, wishing she could make everything better in an instant, including the issue of custody.

                “Oh baby-boy, you’re sick right now, but I promise when you get better I’ll do my best to bring you home with me. You have a lot of family now. You’ll never be alone.” She promised, stroking his hair. His pout increased before turning into a shy grin as he registered her words.

                “Rearry? Who?” he asked. She laughed slightly.

                “There’s Papa H, he’s a really cool guy. Aunt Callie, she’s tough but really cool. Uncle Eric, Uncle Ryan.” She replied. His grin widened and he lay down, streatching out and seeming to relax as she spoke about the people  who cared for him. There was a hint of disbelief in his eyes, but he was calming as she spoke anyways.

                 “K. I promise to get better fast. I don like it here.” He replied, his pout threatening to come back.

* * *

 

                   Dr. Michaels was watching the interaction with a woman. She nodded as Alex calmed the little boy in the bed down, coaxing him from his curled position and getting him to interact with her instead of ignoring his surrounding like he had for the five minuted before she'd come. Alexx was definatly good with Alexander, and she had formed a bond of trust with him, that other foster parents wouldn't have. Right now keeping Alexander stable was thier main goal, so why mess with a good thing?

               “You’re right John. They’ve bonded, but can she commit to a child? A four year old? They need a lot of care and attention.” The woman asked. John looked at her seriously.

               “Cass I don’t think that will be a problem. If Alexx got Alexander he would come first over everything.” He replied, his voice and face serious. She nodded slowly.

               “I think you might be right in favoring his placement with her. She’s already an approved foster parent so I could pull a few strings until the custody hearing.” She replied before turning and leaving. John grinned, proud of himself. Alexx would get her baby-boy, he was sure of it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: An update for my lovelies. Since this one is an archive work Editing it is pretty quick. Hope you guys enjoy it!

               “Ms. Woods? I’m Jennifer Corbin, I’m with child services. I thought I should speak with you, since Alexander Speedle is going to be released from the hospital later today.” Jen informed her, sitting down in a chair primly. She was looking at Alexx from across her desk in the morgue, seemingly unaffected by the fact there were corpses in storage around her. Alexx smiled at her, hoping whatever she had come to speak about with her would bode well. She had put in an official request to foster Lexxie, but she knew things like that took time to process. Especially because she was involved in his mother’s murder case, if only as the M.E. She didn’t want her grand baby to go into foster care though, he’d been through enough and right now he just needed a safe place that he could settle into, put roots down so she could move on so to say.

               “Yes? Is this about my request to have guardianship?” she asked straight forward. She didn’t see any reason to mince words, not when a little life was involved. Jen smiled a little wider at her response.

                “I’ve been observing your interaction with Alexander at the hospital, and from my background check I think you will make a wonderful guardian for him. I noticed you’ve already filed the proper paper work involved in at least fostering him, so I know you’re serious about taking him in and it wasn’t a spur of the moment decision.” She replied, getting straight to the point. Alexx’s smile broadened as she got a good feeling about this visit.

                She didn’t just want Lexxie for Speed’s sake, although he heart still twanged painfully at the thought of her Pseudo son. Speed would have adored Lexxie, and she wished that Jessica had told him he was a father when she found out she was pregnant. So much could have changed, Tim might not even be dead if he'd known about Lexxie. He might have been more careful, knowing that he had a child waiting for him, depending on him to come home.

               “That’s wonderful. I was worried what would happen to the baby-boy, even though I’d filed the paper work I know things take time. I was scared he’d have to go into the system for a while before I heard back on whether I’d be able to take him in or not.”  She replied, relief clear in her voice. Jen nodded, looking like she understood her concern. Alexx didn’t think she did, but she wouldn’t call her on it.

                “Normally your paper work would take some time to be processed, especially because of your involvement in his mother’s homicide case. Some exceptions are being made, due your relationship with his biological father before he passed, your reputation and the fact that Dr. Michaels vouched for you. You’re position within the police station worked both for and against you though. Some concerns were brought up over your work schedule, and such, but I have every confidence that it won’t be an issue. I’m going to need you to sign a few things, and perform the mandatory random check ins, but I have a feeling you have nothing to worry about when it comes to keeping him in the long run.” She assured her. Alexx nodded, having expected all of that.

                “I already have a room in my house set up for my grandbaby, and a wardrobe, toys and anything the team could think of for him. No matter how long it took I wasn’t going to give up on bringing him home where he belongs. He needs a stable environment, and with who his daddy was to this team none of us were letting him go easily.” She informed her, her face serious. Jen nodded again, looking a little impressed by her words.

               “That’s good. Do you mind me asking about why you call Alexander your grandbaby? She asked, relaxing in the chair, as if the hard work was done and she wasn’t observing her reactions. Alexx knew better though- it was this woman’s job to make sure that Lexxie’s placement was a healthy one and that they cared for him for his own merits and not just because they had known his father. Alexx’s smile grew wistful as she thought on the question though, she had loved Speed like he was her own and his death had hit her hard.

               “His father, the one that passed away without knowing about him, was like my son. So Alex is my grandbaby in that respect. I only want to see him flourish, and to take care of him like I know Tim would have wanted to be done. That boy wasn’t one to step down from his responsibilities, and if he had known about Lexxie the baby would have never been in Ms. Harris’ care, let alone in the condition he lived in.” She replied easily, pride for speed and Lexxie in her voice although she didn’t know if the other woman could tell the difference. Jen nodded, her respect for Alexx growing as her smile eased into something more natural.

              “I’m sure Mr. Speedle would have liked to know you’re looking after his child Ms. Woods. From what I’ve heard about him he wouldn’t have appreciated the condition his son was in when you found him. And you’re right. Alexander needs a stable environment. One that won’t put an emphasis on his experiences, but will encourage him to recover and grow. I think you’re just to woman that child needs to become a healthy adult.” She assured her before getting up and gathering the paper’s Alexx had signed while they were talking.

              “I’ll see you at the check in Ms. Woods, enjoy your grandchild. You’re clear to pick him up and take him home as soon as he’s discharged.” She said before leaving. Alexx sighed shaking her head, before picking up her phone. She needed to call Horatio and tell him she’d gotten custody and he didn’t need to pull any strings. That man was fiercely protective of Lexxie, partially because of who his father was and partially because how they had found him. That man already loved the little boy his lover had fathered, and Alexx was going to make sure Lexxie knew it. Just because Speedy and Horatio weren’t married didn’t mean the red head wasn’t going to be as much of a father as Speed would have been.

              “Horatio, I just got official custody of Alex, I’m going to be leaving early to pick him up from the hospital just as soon as Dr. Micheals calls to say he’s ready for discharge. Do you want to come over for dinner tonight? I’m sure Lexxie would love to see his Papa H and it will be good to start a routine with him.” She informed him, her voice almost bursting with joy at the news she had. She heard him sigh and he smile faded. Something wasn’t right, and she didn’t know if she wanted to know. The joyful mood seemed to vanish in an instant as she began to worry. A million thought of what could be wrong popped up and she pushed them away, she shouldn't be panicking yet, not untill she knew what was happening.

             “That’s great news Alexx, but I just got a call from the FBI Witness Protection Unit. Apparently they caught the people who had been after one of their witness’ and put them away. They were informing me that the witness would be coming out of hiding, and therefore back from the dead, literally. What I’m saying Alexx, is Speed is alive, and on a plane back to Miami. As soon as the people that tried to have him killed were behind bars he opted out of the program against their advice.” He intoned, his voice dull and serious. He sounded like he was in shock at that moment, and so was she. Alexx almost dropped her phone as everything went numb, this had to be some wonderful dream that she was going to wake up from because she had seen the body.

             “Oh my god.” She whispered, her voice faint. “Why didn’t he tell us someone was after him, that he was alive? How are you doing Horatio?” she whispered, almost afraid to speak louder, as if she would wake herself if she did. They had found out Speedy had a child, and now Speedy was  alive? It was some cruel trick, it had to be. Horatio sighed again, sounding old and tired, two things Alexx didn’t associate with him normally.

              “You know he couldn’t tell us he was alive Alexx. He didn’t even know it was going to happen, that they were going to fake his death that is. The M.E. who pronounced him dead at the scene was with the FBI. From what I was told he didn’t have a choice in the matter.” He replied dryly. Alexx swallowed hard, trying to wrap her mind around what was happening, around what she was being told because she still couldn’t believe it.

              “Who did I autopsy then? Because that looked like my baby-boy Horatio. That looked like your Speed. I still remember having to cut into his body.” She asked shakily, because that moment stuck in her mind. She still had nightmares about having to autopsy him, but she had gone through with it. In her mind it was proof that this was just a sick joke. Something that someone should be slapped over playing, because it wasn’t true.

                “They switched Tim’s body with an almost identical man who had been killed because he looked like him. There was a hit out on Tim, but it only gave a general description. The other man died that day in a separate attack. I’m doing fine Alexx. I’m more worried about how Tim is going to take finding out he has a son, who was neglected on top of returning to where he almost died.” He replied, his voice showing his anxiety for a brief moment. Alexx sighed, still trying to make herself believe what he was saying, before a slight smile tilted her lips at the brave front he was trying to show. She knew him though and she knew he was worried.

                “Don’t try and fib on me Horatio. You’re also anxious about seeing your Speed again, and if he’ll want what you two had back again. You don’t have to worry, my boy loves you, and Alex adores his Papa H  so even if that boy decided to be stubborn his baby boy won’t let that happen. Alex will need you when he meets Speed, he’s just getting over the fact we knew his daddy, and his daddy was dead. It’s going to be hard explaining to him what really happened if this is all tru. I’m reserving the right to believe it myself until I have that boy in my arm again.” She responded wryly. Horatio grunted, not sounding amused by her reaction to his worry.

                 “I know Alexx. Just go and bring your grandson home. I’ll be over with the team tonight, for a welcome home dinner.” He responded abruptly,  changing the subject. Alex nodded, even though he couldn’t see her.

                 “Alright. What about Speed, you said he was on a plane back to Miami?” she asked, even though she still didn’t know if she believed he was or not. Horatio sighed again and she heard the creaking of a chair.

                “He will most likely try and make contact with you first, since you are the safe bet if I understand his thinking still. With me there will be anxiety over my reaction to him being alive. He knows you’ll just be happy to see him and he doesn’t have a reason to have any doubts with you. I expect he’ll be showing up sometime after I get the team over there to be truthful. I haven’t told them about the call from the FBI yet so they don’t know.” He replied with a grunt, as if knowing Speed would go to her first didn’t bother him. Alexx snorted at his rationalization. He was probably right but both those boys had their doubts on how the other would be reacting.

               “Setting up an ambush for our boy are we? Well I’m in. I’ll see you all tonight, we’re having Lasagna, its Alex’s favorite food, next to Twinkies. I didn’t think feeding him junk food for dinner would be setting a good example on what’s healthy or not. Even though lord knows he needs some meat on his bones.” she replied before hanging up. She waited a second before dialing the hospital. If Speed was going to be showing up then she’d want to get Alex home soon. Hopefully Dr. Micheals wouldn’t mind releasing him a little early. After confirming she could pick him up early she gathered her things. She had a baby to rescue from the hospital and feed before his daddy showed up. Hopefully she could explain things to him enough so he understood what was happening.

* * *

 

                Alex was impatiently waiting for his Alexx to get here so he could get the hell out of this place. He knew things weren’t right with the world around him. He could remember things he knew he shouldn’t even know in fact. But he accepted his life in the here and now, because even though he’d woken up in a cupboard life was better now than it had been before. He was a four year old boy, who was going home to his caring family and that is all that mattered to him, his memories from before, they were just a bad dream that wasn’t going to happen again.  Suddenly his favorite person’s face was coming and he grinned to himself, he really likes Alexx.

               The stupid I.V. was out, and a nurse had helped him get dressed in the clothes Papa H had bought for him. Having a step-father who had dated his new apparently dead father was kind of cool. Papa H was nothing like his nightmare father was, and he seemed to care for him even though he really didn’t know him. There was a look in Papa H’s eye whenever he visited that told Alex that the man wouldn’t ever let anything happen to him if he had a choice. Papa H must have really loved his dad though, because the look was also sad in a way, and it was a little sad that his dad was dead. That Papa H didn't have him anymore.

               He couldn’t wait to go to his new home though. He was more than ready to get out of the hospital and into some place more cozy. He hoped Alexx had a big yard, being cooped up had made him want to run around and scream his head off. Alexx told him that he could spend nights over at Papa H’s sometimes as she was obviously trying to make sure they connected and he was looking forward to it. He wanted to know as much as he could about the man that was his father, since he was dead and he'd never got to meet him. From the pictures that Alexx and the others had shown him he looked alot like Timothy Speedle.

             Alexx smiled as she spotted him, making his heart leap in his chest in a good way. He had to say having people be happy with seeing him felt good. Having them look at him like he meant something was even better though. He pushed his nightmare memories to the back of his mind. They didn’t matter anymore, and he had to remember that. He had a new life, so he shouldn’t dwell on a bad dream. If he did that he wouldn't be able to enjoy the life he had now.

            “Don’t you look handsome Baby-boy?” she cooed, coming into the room with a large smile and a twinkle in her eye. He grinned, blushing slightly at the warm feeling her greeting made him feel.

             “Alexx! You here!” He greeted, slipping off the bed and running to her as fast as his legs would carry him. He grabbed one of her legs and refused to let go. There was no way anyone was going to make him leave her. When she left this time he was going with her. If he had super glue he’d glue himself to her even though removing it would hurt. She chuckled slightly, smiling down at him with soft eyes full of love.

             “Come on Baby-boy, let’s get you home.” She whispered softly, picking him up. He felt safe in her arms, and he like that, it helped him reinforce his resolve to forget the nightmarish memories he was in possession of and embrace the life that was being offered up to him on a golden platter. He cuddled into her, laying his head on her shoulder as she grabbed the bags of the personal effects he had garnered over the past two weeks from the staff, and the team that his father had worked with. Which was a lot of things in his mind at least.

              As they left the hospital, and the things it represented behind he smiled into her hair. He was going to make the most out of this chance at another life. With that thought he slipped from a mature mindset, back into the proper one and looked at the world from the unjaded eyes of a child. His next adventure was just starting and he couldn’t wait to see what was going to happen next. He wasn’t the least bit afraid though, because he was safe.

             Alexx buckled up her new grandbaby in his booster seat, and she couldn’t help but to think about her baby and what he must be feeling right now. Tim had been forced into hiding, and the FBI had covered his tracks to the extent of substituting a body to reinforce the idea that he was dead so they  wouldn’t keep looking. If Speed had just dissipeared after the shooting nothing would have stopped them from finding him, and the bastards knew it. She could still remember having to cut what she thought was her baby-boy open, and even if Tim showed up nothing would ever make her forget it. She wanted to punch the person who had made the call to do what they had done.

           He probably was scared to death of their reactions, especially Horatio’s. They had only been together bout seven months when he’d ‘died’. Alexx was sure Lexxie was the product of a club visit almost a year before he’d even thought of getting the courage together to make a move on Horatio, before he had even admitted to himself that Horatio was what he wanted. She sighed as she shut the passenger door of her car after she finished and climbed into the driver’s seat. It took a moment for her to put the keys into the ignition as her mind started bringing up the logistics of the coming days. It wasn’t going to be a walk in the park, that much was sure.

           Telling Timmy about his baby was going to make this situation even more stressful on the boy, but she couldn’t help it. She wouldn’t hide Lexxie, and Tim wouldn’t forgive her even if she tried. He was going to be livid his child had suffered period. She’d be there for her baby, and her grand-baby every step of the way though. Through ever nightmare and every moment of insecurity, because as soon as Tim got home her family was going to be whole again, she’d make sure of it. She started the car with that resolve echoing in her mind

           “You ok?” Lexxie asked from the backseat as they pulled out of the Hospital, his little voice meek with worry. She smiled into the review mirror, so he could see her. He was such a sweet baby, even with what he’d gone through. It was no wonder that everyone who had met him fell in love with him.

           “I’m fine Lexxie. How about McDonald’s for Lunch?” she asked, thinking fast about what to do next. She needed to have him fed before they got home, in case Tim was there. Because the moment he got home things were going to be hectic and Lexxie needed to gain weight, since he was too small, and missing meals wouldn’t help. She saw him grin at her offer and resisted the urge to laugh as his face lit up. She was going to have so much fun spoiling him rotten.

          “Chicken and Toy!” he declared, his voice excited. She did laugh this time, unable to resist.

          “Chicken and toy it is, and then we can go home and you can see your new room.” She agreed, driving the short distance to the fast food place. She parked and then got her grand-baby out of the car before carrying him inside. Lexxie was vibrating with energy as they ate and she laughed as he finished his meal off, before running into the play area after looking to her for permission.  She ate her food more sedately, imprinting the laughing boy into her memory banks, replacing the memories of the frightened dirty boy they had rescued from the cupboard in front of his dead mother’s body. She knew he’d seen Jessica as she’d carried him to the bathroom, and could only hope he hadn’t been traumatized by that sight. There had been too many wrongs in his young life.

          By the time they left McDonald’s Lexxie had worn himself out playing and that might be a good thing. As she carried him to the car, his head drifted to the side and he fell asleep in her arms, showing how much he trusted her in that one little action more than anything else. She smiled softly, and buckled him up before driving the rest of the way home, wondering what or rather who might be waiting for her when she got there. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: A new chapter with a new twist lovelies. I've edited it, but this was written a bit ago. I'm glad it's getting a good reception! PS Feed the Review monster!

               Timothy Speedle shifted nervously as he stood in front of Alexx Woods’ home, waiting for her to show up. He knew he should have called, so she wasn’t surprised by him showing up, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He’d been debriefed that she had to autopsy what she had thought was him and it made him cringe, and want to yell at the same time. He would have stayed, would have trusted his team to look out for his well being if he’d just been given the choice. Only it was taken out of his hands, and his life was torn apart on a damned whim. He could only hope that he was able to reclaim a fraction of what he had before.

               He assumed the FBI agent that had been handling his case had already informed the people who thought him to be dead of his continued existence, and that Alexx would be the best to come to first so he could ease into life as Speed again. But she wasn’t here yet. He figured she was still at work, so he had no problem of waiting for her to get home. It gave him a little bit more time to think about what was going to happen next, and how he was going to handle everything. He just wanted to turn back the clock three years and make sure this never happened, but he couldn't.

               Hell he’d been waiting to tell his friend’s and what family he did claim, like his little brother who had been put through the same shit by the family in a round about way when they were younger because of a shady deal gone bad that their father had made, that he had been alive for the last three years. A deal that ended with men trying to kill him in revenge and his brother, Tony thinking he was dead until he turned 18. He could wait a couple more hours. As he got ready to sit down a car pulled up, Alexx. She didn’t look shocked to see him and he grinned sheepishly as she parked, of course she would show up just now. He shrugged before coming over to her car and stopping at her door. She rolled her window down and gave him her famous, ‘you are in trouble boy’ look, making him smile a little and bask in the feeling of her caring. She was the only mother figure he counted.

               “You have some explaining to do Speedy, but first help me get Lexxie inside and into bed. He’s had a big day today and he’s tired out, the poor baby. Explanations can wait a little while longer. It’s good to see you alive though darling.” She cut off whatever he was going to say, and he heard the automatic locks open. He looked into the back seat, curious as to who this Lexxie was and did a double take at what he saw softly snoring away, oblivious to his presence. A dark haired boy, who didn’t look any older than three was sleeping in a child’s chair, and Speed only took a moment to wonder why Alexx had him before it clicked in his mind. His facial features were ones Tim looked at every day. He tore his gaze away after a second and looked at Alexx bewildered, not knowing what the hell was going on. If it was what he thought it was then his life was definatly never going to be the same as it had been.

                “Alexx, what’s going on? That child looks like me. I don’t remember having any children.” he whispered, his voice taking a panicked note. From the child’s apperent age conceptions would have occurred just before the shooting, but he’d been with Horatio then. He hadn’t slept with a woman in over a year at that point. She chuckled slightly, making Tim bristle as he thought she was laughing at him. This was no laughing matter, because if he had a child, who was conceived while he was happily involved with Horatio god only knew what the other man thought. He had never cheated on him though so this child confused him.

                “Speedy, meet Alexander James Lavelle, well Speedle now. He’s 4 years old, his mother died two weeks ago and we caught the case. From what we gathered after we found him locked in a cupboard at the crime scene you and Jessica had a one night stand after one too many drinks at a local club and ended up in bed in which you did all the things a man and a woman do. Don’t you worry, this was before you and Horatio got the courage up to admit you wanted each other. She left before you woke up and didn’t try contacting you again, not even when she had Lexxie 9 months later.” She explained, her voice soft and calming and a tinge or regret from laughing tinting her voice. He blanched as she spoke, his knees feeling weak as he realized he had a child, a son. Then he looked back and examined the frail form closely, his instincts not liking what he found. His son hadn’t had an easy life, not by along shot.

                 “Alexx, he doesn’t look more than 3 years old.” He whispered, his voice darkening as just what that meant set in. She nodded grimly.

                 “He’s just got out of the hospital. He’s still malnourished, but I can help correct that, and so can you. I have a feeling that now that you know about him it won’t matter that I have custody of him for the moment. We’ll have to straighten that out as soon as we can.” She replied, her voice thick. He looked at her with fire in his eyes. He was beyond  angry, but he couldn't go back and fix this either.

                  “You’re damn right Alexx. I hate this, not only did I most likely lose my lover because of the Damned FBI, my son, a son I had no idea existed was ignored and neglected. What was his mother’s occupation? I don’t remember her.” He asked, somewhat shamed by his promiscuous past. Alexx smiled at him gently, trying to calm him with a look alone. It wasn’t working, he wanted to hit something, he wanted to yell damnit. It had been bad enough when he thought he was just facing losing Horatio by coming back. Now he had a son to take care of, one that had been abused and neglected if his assesment and Alexx's words rang true.

                   “Relax Speedy; Lexxie’s Papa H still wants you. And Jessica was a prostitute. She turned tricks from the apartment they lived in and locked him in the cupboard when she was entertaining. Her last john is actually the suspect in her murder at the moment.” She explained, getting out of her car as speed stepped away and made his way to his son’s door. Speed was pale as he listened to what the woman who had given birth to his son had done, then his face hardened. If Jessica was still alive he would have had words for her, but she wasn’t. All he could do was take care of his child, and to make sure Lexxie never had to experience anything like that again.

                   He opened the car door as he made his resolve before unbuckled the four year old. Lexxie, as Alexx called him, grumbled in his sleep as Speed lifted him from the car and held him in a smooth motion that he hadn’t expected to be able to pull off. Alexx smiled as he moved away from the car, his son cuddling into him and a solid warmth in his arms. No matter what happened he had Lexxie to take care of and oddly enough he could feel his nerves about seeing Horatio calm a little bit. Lexxie needed him to be strong, to take care of him, He wouldn’t ever let his son down, not like his father had done. She shut the door as he moved from the car and he followed her inside, being careful not to jostle or wake the precious cargo in his arms. He was already in love with the little boy.

                He was amazed as Alexx led him into a fully decked out room fit for any child. In all actuality whoever had done it had gone a little overboard, but he wouldn’t mention that. He had a feeling he would be spoiling Lexxie himself soon enough. She grinned at his reaction, a knowing look in her eyes and pulled back the X-men bed covers. He set his son, oh my god he had a son, down and set to work on getting his spider-man shoes off. After he was done Alexx let him replace the blankets and tuck Lexxie in before leading him out. He flicked the light switch before they closed the door. Suddenly he felt a little faint and leaned against the wall.

               “I have a son Alexx, He looks like me. Oh God I’m not only going to have to tell my family I’m alive, but that I have a son. And Horatio, how am I supposed to explain Lexxie to him. I was an idiot, I slept with a woman while I was drunk and didn’t bother to try and track her down after. I let that little boy live the way he did.” He murmured faintly. She sighed, recognizing the signs of shock as it hit Speed. Her poor baby probably had been holding everything in for the  past three years, but it was coming out now, Lexxie being the last proverbial straw.

               “I know Speedy, let’s get you some tea. And it’s not your fault he lived the way he did. You had no say in it, and you didn’t even remember sleeping with Lavelle” She announced, leading him to the kitchen. He followed, unresisting in her grip. She sat him at the table and set about getting a cub of sweet tea, and a light snack. Speedy looked too thin for her liking. It looked like the poor boy hadn’t been able to keep any sort of weight on while he was being hidden. His lips twitched as she set down his lunch, looking amused by her behavior for a brief moment.

                “God I missed you Alexx” He muttered, before digging in. She chuckled, sitting down and watching him.

                “So what happened after the shooting? Where did the FBI send you, and who did they set you up as.” She questioned after a few moments, when he paused from eating and looked at her. He sighed, rubbing his eyes.

                “I woke up in a hospital in Michigan. I’d almost died 4 times on the table, according to my Doctors. I freaked when they told me I was officially dead because someone really wanted me dead, and that for an indefinite amount of time I would be Tony Riddle, Science teacher. I was in the hospital for three weeks, recovering from the damages. When I was let out there wasn’t anything I could do to reverse what had been done. It wasn’t as hard to adjust to as it was the first time I went under though.” He muttered quickly, taking a sip of his tea. Alexx nodded, resisting the urge to growl and find the men who had taken him away. They would have protected him.

                “I remember the day I met Timothy Speedle, who was once Timothy DiNozzio. I still want to kill your father for almost getting when you were nine with his own idiocy and double dealings. And I remember the day you were able to contact Tony. Have you called him yet to let him know that you’re alive and well? That boy adores you and he’s going to adore Lexxie even more. I know when he came for your funeral he was a damned mess. He kept your secret though, he didn’t tell anyone he worked with he was coming for his brother’s funeral” she asked. He shook his head negatively. He had wanted to get his life in Miami straightened out before dragging Tony into the mess. Now with Lexxie he doubted his brother would be leaving Miami for  a while. Tony loved kids.

               “No. I was more set on getting back to H and you guys and getting everything settled here. I’m calling him tonight though. He’ll kill me if I keep his nephew away from him” He responded with a sheepish look. She smiled.

               “You can call from my phone, if Horatio doesn’t kidnap you.” She replied softly. He gave her a tired smile.

                “I don’t think H will want me back Alexx. Not after living with me being dead, and then finding out I have a son.” He replied, his voice brittle. She rolled her eyes at his reaction. She knew Horatio wasn’t going to let him go.

                “Please honey that man was a wreck for years after you ‘died’ he’s just now getting out of his slump. He’s nervous you won’t want him. I swear you men are so pig-headed.” She muttered, sounding  a little agitated. He grinned, seemingly ignoring her reassurance about Horatio as he went to sass her.

                “And that’s the way you like us.” He teased, before yawning loudly. She tsked, before standing.

                 “You should lay down Timmy.” She reprimanded, thinking that he was going to need all the rest he could grab before the team got here. She didn’t feel bad about going through with the ambush. Speed needed a big dose of reality and Lexxie wanted to see his family. It was as simple as that. He gave her a mock salute.

                  “Yes Mom.” He responded, before frowning as he stood up. “Where?” He asked. She sighed.

                  “Your room. I never had the heart to clear it out from when you used to crash here before. It’s a little dusty, but it’s all still there.” She replied softly. He looked at her and sighed, his eyes dark with guilt.

                   “I’m so sorry Alexx. About everything. It never should have happened, I should have never been declared dead.” He apologized softly, his voice mournful. She rolled her eyes again, smiling tightly.

                   “Never mind that. You go lay down, Lexxie will be waking up sooner or later and I want a chance to explain this too him. And then you’re going to have to deal with a four year old, who by the way has put you in a little bit of a hero status from the stories he’s been told.” She ordered playfully. He nodded and got up before wandering away in the direction of the guest bedroom that he had claimed as his own  years ago. Alexx looked at his dishes and sighed, before going about cleaning up. Her baby was home, but he needed to be taken care of.

* * *

 

                   Jethro watched carefully as Fornell pulled Tony aside, a serious look on his face. Well a look that said he had something to say that Tony wasn’t going to like at all. He got up as Tony blanched as Fornell talked, and before he reached the pair Tony had decked the FBI agent and kicked him as he fell to the ground The other man’s handsome face was contorted in an expression of Anger that Gibbs wasn’t used to seeing on the normally joking man’s face. He stepped a little faster wanting to stop Tony before he did something he’d regret

                   “You fucking assholes! This is the second time I’ve had to morn him, to think he was dead. Fuck, if someone wanted to kill him we could of handled it. Instead you fucking took him when he was almost fatally shot and let us think he was dead. Then you assholes dragged the investigation out three fucking years.” Tony yelled, his voice cracking as he spoke, before pulling back his leg to kick the downed man again. He’d obviously forgotten about his weapon, because it looked like he wanted to kill the other man where he lay. Fornell grunted as another kick landed, not trying to defend himself, which stunned Gibbs. The other man must think he deserved the anger that Tony was raining down at him. He paused as he heard  brother mentioned. As far as he knew Tony was an only child, but then again the other man didn’t speak about his family a lot. Even DiNozzo senior wasn’t mentioned without a sneer and pent up anger. The man who called himself Tony’s father was a screw up though.

                   “I know your upset DiNozzio, but the threat has been neutralized, and he’s back home in Miami- he opted out of the program the first chance he got. You might want to look him up, it’s just come to light he has a four year old son. Congratulations, you have a nephew.” Fornell wheezed before another kick landed on his ribs. That stopped Tony before Gibbs could, and even Gibbs himself didn’t move as Tony’s chest heaved as he processed the declaration. Finally he looked back down at Fornell, his leg drawing back as if he was going to kick him again.

                   “What?” he asked his tone dangerous. Fornell looked up at him, a wry smile on his lips.

                   “You have a four year old nephew. Timothy never knew about him. His mother was a one night stand who probably didn’t even realize she’d slept with him. She was a pay-girl. Your nephew only came to light when she was murdered and the Miami CSI found him locked in a cupboard and preceded with DNA testing. He was just released from the hospital, after a two week stay for malnutrition.” He elaborated, speaking slowly so there was no doubt as to what he said. Tony looked ready to go at him again as everything registered.

                    “What’s his name?” he asked tightly, his fists clenching.

                     “Alexander James Speedle. Alexx Woods has custody of him, considering when he was found Timothy was still considered dead. The FBI is going to help speed along the custody issues though.” Fornell replied. Tony snorted, putting his foot back down on the ground, before taking a deep breath.

                  “It’s also Alexander James DiNozzio. Tim may be in hiding from our father’s mistakes, but he’s still my brother, and he’s still a DiNozzio.” He grunted before turning to face Gibbs, a flash of regret passing over his features. Gibbs wanted to hug him, to comfort him , but they had an agreement. Nothing personal at work..

                   “I’m taking time off. I’m needed in Miami.” He informed him shortly, before leaving MTAC. Gibbs looked at Fornell and snorted as the other man picked himself up off the ground.

                   “Well shit, you’ve stepped in it this time.” He muttered, before looking up and then making his way to the garage, hoping to catch tony and talk before he took off to Miami. He wasn’t going to demand explanations as to why he had never heard about his brother, but he wanted to make sure his lover knew that he was there for him if he needed to vent. He knew damned will that they each still held secrets, but Tony had apparently gone through thinking his brother was dead without letting anyone in on the fact that he was grieving.

                He caught up with the other man by the elevator and stepped in with him. As soon as the doors closed Tony was hugging him, his shoulder’s shaking. Gibbs felt a small wet spot and knew that Tony was crying. He stopped the elevator. No one would think twice about it, considering he used it for meetings all the time. After a few moments Tony looked up. Grief and rage were clear on the younger man’s face and Gibbs felt a stab of worry.

              “I thought he was dead this time Gibbs. When I was a kid, there was no body to bury, but this time they made sure there was one. Damn it Jethro, we could have protected him, his people could have protected him. They didn’t need to fake his death.” He whispered, his voice cracking. Gibbs hugged him close.

              “Where is he now?” He asked. Tony inhaled shakily relaxing into his embrace.

               “Fornell said he was at one of his co-worker’s. Alexx Woods. Tim’s a CSI with the Miami police, at least he was one. I’m sure he’ll get his job back because he’s damned good at it. He was involved with his Boss, one Horatio Cain. I’m sure that will go back to normal too though, that man loves Tim. I can only imagine how he’s taking this.” He replied softly. Gibbs grunted, kissing the top of his head and cursing the FBI for their decision.

               “We’ll stop by your apartment and get your close, then we’ll hit my house before going to the airport.” He promised. Tony looked up at him surprised and Jethro smirked. “I’m not going to let you go through this alone and I want to meet this brother of yours.” He replied wryly. Tony snorted and he hit the button to resume their elevator trip. Tony stayed in his arms, the rules about personal contact at work forgotten for now. Gibbs held him, knowing that he needed the comfort.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay- this update was a long time in coming- and it's short... I'm so sorry- i'll try and have another edited soon. I kinda have been working on other stories and the Bunnies from Once Was Lost are holding me hostage. 
> 
> I'm so sorry- i hope this is okay!

              Buffy looked up from the book she’d been researching from. Giles wouldn’t help her in her quest to find a way to bring Xander back, and neither would Willow. They had both accepted that Xander was in a better place, but they didn’t understand. She hadn’t meant to hurt him, and they needed him here so they could protect him. He was a trouble magnet! He couldn’t stay away from danger if he was locked in a safe zone. She needed to get him back, and then things would go back to normal. Willow would stop looking at her like she hated her, and life would go on. Xander would forgive her like always and there wouldn’t be tension in the group anymore.

             “You’re not going to find him. It was determined the demon who granted the wish didn’t mean harm, and that means what I asked for came true. He’s going to have a happy childhood, with parents that care, people who recognize he’s smart, and everything else I asked for. He’s safe and you’re just pissed he’s not at you beck and call anymore.” Dawn sneered. Buffy looked up and glared at her younger sister. They had been at each other’s throats since the wish. Buffy wouldn’t admit she was in the wrong, and she was pissed.

              “Go away Dawn. It’s your fault this happened. If you hadn’t over reacted like the little drama queen you are than everything would be back to normal by now. Instead I have to find a way to bring Xander back before he get’s himself killed and everyone is stuck on the fact thta i made one little mistake and let my temper get the best of me.” She sneered angrily. Dawn shrugged off her accusation, not looking impressed at all.

             “Whatever makes it easier for you to sleep at night your highness. Xander wouldn’t have forgiven you for putting him in the hospital though. You’re as delusional as you sound if you think he would have.” She taunted meanly, before leaving, the door slamming behind her. Buffy dove into her books once more, ignoring the little voice in the back of her head that was screaming that Dawn was right and she was wrong. She knew that she had made a big mistake in hurting Xander, and that he would never forgive her for it, but she had to get him back anyway. Without him here things were falling apart, and she couldn't handle that.

* * *

 

              Alexx sighed as Lexxie woke up, yawning and looking around his room curiously. At every toy his eyes would brighten and the grin on his face would widen. She could see just how much he enjoyed his room just in his expression and that made her happy. She wanted him to have the childhood that he deserved, and this was only just the beginning of things. First she had to tell him that his Daddy was alive, and explain what happened the best she could though. She waited before his gaze dropped to her before sitting in the side of his bed. He looked at her curiously as she gathered her thoughts and she smiled at him reassuringly.

             “Lexxie, do you remember how We told you about your Daddy?” She asked carefully, still trying to decide just how to tell the child his father was alive. Lexxie looked at her with too intelligent eyes, nodding and she smiled softly. This little guy had a brain on him. He’d handled everything so far so much better than an average four year old. But living like he had would make a child mature faster no matter what.

             “Daddy got hurt by bad men and had to go away like mommy the end.” Lexxie replied, stating the fact that he knew. She leaned over and cupped his cheek softly, looking him in the eyes. Large green eyes locked onto hers and he stiffened slightly, she resisted the urge to panic at the move, instead she kept her calm mask on. Change would be a sensitive thing for him for a long time and she knew it.

              “We were wrong. He was hurt badly, and he had to go away but it wasn’t permanent like your mommy. He found his way home.” She murmured. Large green eyes widened, tearing up for some reason.

             “I have to go away now?” He asked. Her own eyes widened and she dragged him into a hug- kissing his head.

              “Oh no, no sweets. You don’t have to go anywhere. Your Daddy’s going to be staying here for a while, to get back on his feet and everything. But he loves you. I told him about you and he loved you from the second he saw you. I promise.” She cooed, cursing herself. She should have been able to find a way to break this to Lexxie without sending him into a panic about being shuffled around. Lexxie relaxed in her arms slightly, still stiff as a board though. After a couple minutes his little arms surrounded her neck and he inhaled deeply.

             “Where?” He asked. She kissed the top of his head softly.

             “He’s sleeping in his room. He’s scared too. When the bad men hurt him he didn’t have a choice in wheather he went away or not. And now he’s afraid that he doesn’t have a place here. That Papa H won’t want him anymore. And he was tired. I made him take a nap.” She explained patiently. Lexxie giggle for some reason, his mood turning from scared to amused in the blink of an eye.

             “Daddy was a cranky pants and got put down for a nap?” He asked, pulling away. Instead of fear mischief sparkled in his green eyes, making her relax. She nodded and he returned her nod, a serious look on his little face. “Then Lexxie makes sure that no one wakes Daddy until he’s better.” He said, before slipping out of bed and her arms. Alexx watched as he went over to the little desk that Calleigh had added to his room and grabbed a pencil.

            “I draw for him.” Lexxie declared, befor e getting to work, his little tounge peeking from behind his lips as he started concentrating. When Alexx headed to the kitched he followed her, a pile of pictures for his daddy building up. On the way they stopped at Speed’s room and Lexxie was quiet as he looked over his father.

           “Racoon eyes.” He pointed out- meaning the dark circles around his father's eyes- proof that the man in bed hadn't been sleeping right and for a while. Alexx bit back a laugh, nodding, before they left him to rest.

* * *

 

          Alexx looked up from her Lexxie watching as the doorbell rang. She looked over to make sure the four year old was still drawing, before going to the door. Horatio and Eric were waiting at the door and she could see Ryan and Calleigh pulling up- sharing a car. She opened the door, nodding to her friends.

          “Hello Horatio, Eric.” She greeted.  They both nodded, and walked into the house as she motioned for them to. She watched as Horatio walked to Lexxie and smiled as he knelt down, brushing a kiss over the four year old’s forehead. Lexxie beamed up at him, love pouring out of his green eyes. The two of them were close, which was good. Speed wouldn’t know what hit him with the two of them teamed up against him.

           “Hey little guy, how are you  doing today? I see that you finally escaped the white prison. What are you drawing?” Horatio asked as she turned to let the other two people in. She heard Lexxie giggle at his statements and smiled just a little wider. The scene from earlier- when Lexxie thought he was going to be sent away still fresh in her mind. Lexxie was used to the people around him and any deviation from the routine he’d set up wouldn’t be good. Speed would understand that- more than people would think considering his own past.

          “I drawing Daddy. Shh. He’s sleeping Papa H.” the four year informed him smartly. Alexx turned around and closed the door after Ryan and Calleigh was inside. Horatio was frozen in a crouched position.

          “Speed is here?” Calliegh asked, her voice cracking suddenly. Alexx nodded.

          “My baby-boy was waiting for me when I got back from picking up Lexxie. He was exhausted; he’s been asleep since about a half an hour after we got home. He’s in shock about the whole situation.” She replied, coming into the kitchen. Horatio moved from his position finally, his knees only making a slight protest to the action.

          “How was he?” he asked quietly, his tone full of worry and love. Alexx smiled softly.

           “Tired and worried. My poor baby is running himself ragged. It looks like he’s lost a lot of weight in the last three years. He’s worried you won’t want him anymore, and he’s in shock about having a son.” She replied. Horatio frowned, before going to the room he knew his lover would be in. It wasn’t Speed’s fault the FBI had taken the measures they had taken.


	7. Meeting and Assuring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright my sweets, sorry for the delay in updates. Big changes in my life though, I'm starting a new job, engaged to be married- and boy did i not know how much goes into planning a wedding. Here's an update though, so please don't sick the plot bunnies on me!?

              Speed woke to the sounds of his old team arriving at the house but stayed in place in his bed, his heart pounding wildly in his chest. This was it. What were their reactions to him being alive? He didn’t know if he could stand being rejected by the man he loved. And he wasn’t only facing it over coming back from the dead. He had his son to think about now, and while he didn’t think Horatio would reject him based on that. It was hell just thinking of what may happen. He cuddled deeper into his blankets as his mind taunted him with what may happen.

              The door to his room opened up and he stayed still, feeling sick to his stomach. He didn’t think his visitor was Alexx, she would have spoken by now. Instead there was only silence in the room and that didn’t help him in anyway. The door closed with a quiet click and footsteps approached his bed in a steady and careful pace.

             “I know you’re awake Speed.” Horatio murmured suddenly, his voice thick and full of something that he didn’t want to believe he was imagining. Speed turned slightly in his cocoon as he gathered his courage and their eyes connected, there were tears in Horatio’s eyes. “I’m so glad you’re alive. And whatever you may think no one blames you for what the FBI chose to do.” He whispered, his voice cracking. Speed’s heart sped up again.

              “H?” he asked, disbelief and wanting clear in his voice. The older man swooped in and kissed him, quieting his doubts and fears in one smooth motion. It was just like his older lover to know what was going on in his mind. And it was just like him to know how to ease his fears. the kiss left him hard and aching and it ended all to soon in his opinion, as his hormones swept his fears under the rug. Horatio looked at him carefully, like he was drinking him in like a tall glass of Calleigh's tea. 

               “I still love you, no matter what I’ll always love you.” Horatio promised, his voice husky from the too chaste kiss. Speed grinned, tears in his own eyes, even as his body continued to react to Horatio’s proximity. He wanted Horatio to take him to bed and erase the last three years from his mind. God only knew how often he had wanted his time in exile to be a nightmare his mind had conjured up.

              “I love you too H, no matter what.” He repeated, his voice thick as he told the truth. There was nothing in this world that would make him change his mind. He just hoped that his lover never forgot, or doubted him in that. Horatio smiled widely at his proclamation, the tension Speed hadn’t noticed in his worry frame fading at his words.

              “Now that we both know what’s going on let’s get out there. It’s a dinner welcoming Lexxie to the family.” Horatio ordered gently, his voice evening out in tempo. There was a note of something there though, like H wanted to prove something in his announcement. Speed looked surprised, both by his tone and the fact that his lover was pointing out the fact that he had a son. It felt like acceptance to Speed, which was good.

            “Alexx didn’t call and tattle on me the minute I fell asleep?” He asked, half jokingly, and half in disbelief. He had expected his lover to be the first one Alexx would have called once she had gotten him to lay down and take a nap. Horatio shook his head, looking amused in the dim light. There was a fond look on his face though.

              “No. we found out you were here from your son. Lexxie was drawing pictures of his daddy sleeping. He informed everyone to be quite too. Alexx told me that he’s decided you haven’t taken care of yourself, and I wouldn't be surprised if the little firecracker told me off for coming in before you came out. Coming from where he did that child doesn’t take having family lightly.” He replied. Speed stopped thinking for a moment. Here is was, Horatio had pointed out the elephant of the fact his child had been abused. His heart ached at the thought of the little boy he had carried into his surrogent mother’s home asleep being anything other that happy. He wanted a piece of Jessica for allowing his child to come to harm. It wouldn’t happen ever again, he was sure of that..

           “I really didn’t know I had a kid H.” he whispered, shaking himself out of his increasingly darker thoughts. Horatio needed to know he hadn’t abandoned the child to the life he’s had. Horatio hugged him.

            “I know that Speed. If you would have known about Lexxie he would have been living with you, and the FBI would have had to do something about him when they decided to put you in hiding. The kid looks like he’s accepting all of what happened as it comes at him. He reminds me of you a lot actually, which means that he’s going to be fine, because he’s stronger than he looks.” Horatio said softly, his voice letting the other man know how attached he was to his son. Speed cuddled into his lovers arms, glad that Horatio accepted all of this, including his son. He may have only seen the kid once, but Lexxie was his blood, the only child he was ever going to have.

            “I feel like shit about it though Horatio. He lived in hell with a prostitute who locked him in a cupboard. It’s not right. I should have known about him and made sure that he didn’t spend a second with that woman that he didn’t need to. I should have been more careful about who I slept with and kept better track of them afterwards, just in case something like this happened.” He whispered, his voice full of regret over the list of things he should have done. Horatio hugged him tighter, as if he could protect him from himself.

            “I understand that this  whole situation is upsetting Tim, but you son needs you now, more than ever. So for the moment let’s forget about the should haves and the what ifs and concentrate on making sure that little boy is happy and well adjusted in his new life. He’s going to need a lot of reassurences that we’re not going to turn mean once he gets used to us, and god knows how much of his adjustment right now is just a child playing along to be accepted.” He replied, his voice turning a little hard. He really cared about Lexxie. Speed nodded.

            “I know. Let’s get out there and make sure he knows he’s welcome and safe.” He murmured before looking up and kissing Horatio softly. The other man deepened the kiss and both were panting when it ended. Horatio groaned softly in his throat and looked slightly frustrated as Speed smirked and got out of bed. He’d take care of that once this little party for his son was over. The reaction he’d received had assured him that he was still wanted, and that was enough for him. Horatio got up himself and smiled softly, shaking his head.

                Hand in hand they wandered back to the welcoming party, intent on making the newest part of their family feel like he belonged. Lexxie was far more important at the moment, but there were no questions about if they were going to work, because neither of the men would allow it not to. They had already lost each other once and it wasn’t going to happen again. No, they just had to pick up the pieces of their life and adjust accordingly.

* * *

 

               Lexxie looked up as his Papa H came back into the room with his Daddy. Papa looked happy, which was good, considering that since the teen  turned toddler had met him he’d always had a sad air around him. He shyly peeked at his daddy, the man who was biologically his father in this life. He didn’t have dark circles around his eyes anymore and as he caught the other man’s gaze a smile passed over his lips. Lexxie felt a blush rising on his cheeks as his new father waved at him and he ducked his head. He had to admit that he was slightly worried that his father wouldn’t accept him, and everyone here had been so nice. He wanted this life. He wanted to be happy.

               “Hey little guy. I heard that you’ve been keeping my friends here on their toes. I’m very happy to meet you, and I promise that as long as I can help it you will never be hurt again. You’re my son and it’s my job to make sure of it.” He heard someone murmur. He looked up into eyes like his. His daddy was looking at him with a gentle look that he’d only ever seen from an older man in his dreams, but never from someone who was related to him.

               “I’m Lexxie.” He whispered, holding out his hand to shake the older man’s. His daddy laughed, and pulled him into his arms instead. Lexxie was only stiff for a second, as the warmth enveloped him. And then he was leaning into the strong chest, his head turned so he could hear the thumping of his daddy’s heart. Green eyes closed as his breathing calmed. He felt safe wrapped in his arms, and he never wanted to lose this.

               “It’s so good to meet you Lexxie. Now what have these trouble makers been up to?” His father joked. There was a flash of a camera going off and the little boy groaned. He had been attacked by the camera monster a lot since he’d been found by his family. Grandma Alexx laughed at his response as his daddy sighed.

               “Best get used to this kiddo. Your grandma there likes her pictures and she’s going to want to remember her grandson and son when she finally starts losing her memory like the old lady she is.” He chirped cheerfully, before  groaning as there was a smacking sound. Lexxie’s head popped up and the little boy glared at his Uncle Eric, who was withdrawing his hand. The Hispanic man looked shocked by his reaction as his daddy rubbed a hand down his back. He didn’t like that someone had hit his father. Hitting hurt- he remembered from experience and his memories that never happened. It wasn’t okay to do even in a joking manner. Grandma Alexx sighed.

              “Uncle Eric didn’t do that to hurt your daddy Lexxie.” She assured him, and then Uncle Eric looked horrified as he understood the small 4 year old’s reaction to his playful slap. He backed away from Lexxie’s daddy.

                “I would never hurt Speed, okay kiddo?” His uncle murmered, sounding like it hurt him to know that Lexxie thought that. His daddy kissed the top of his head, his arms tightening just a little more.

               “It’s okay Delko. Just remember what my son’s been through before you act.” His daddy grunted out, before standing up with Lexxie in his arms. The 4 year old clung to his father as they made their way over to Papa H, who was glaring at his uncle too. The child knew that he’d get along  with his second father just fine right then and there, not that he had doubts that he would before. His Papa didn’t want anyone to hurt Daddy either.

               “I think that perhaps we should get this party started.” Aunt Calleigh broke in, looking from Uncle Eric back to Lexxie’s small family. Lexxie smiled at her a little, relaxing. She was cool to be around, she ddin’t talk to him like he was an idiot, or a baby. Which made her his favorite Aunt. She winked at him and he giggled a little. He missed the look of gratitude his parents sent her, as she pulled out a big present from a pile that had slowly been building ever since his Aunts and Uncles had gotten here. The little boy had to admit he was curious about it.

               “Who is this for?” She hummed, looking at it. She shot him a small look as his attention focused completely on her. A smile flitted across her lips when she saw that and sighed dramatically. “Oh, I think this one says Lexxie. Now would my nephew want this?” She hummed. He scrambled down from his Daddy’s arms as everyone started laughing. He ignored them as he made his ways to his aunt. She handed him the colorfully wrapped gift and he started tearing at the paper. He had been nice about unwrapping gifts in the hospital, but Aunt Calleigh had shown him how to do it properly. Little boys made messes, and that’s what he would remember.

* * *

 

               Alex watched as Lexxie interacted with his daddy and papa H after the gifts had been given, and dinner had been eaten. He wasn’t the scared little boy that they had pulled out of the cupboard. She knew that mentally Lexxie would have things to work through because what had happened to him, but he was still young enough to recover. As Lexxie tired, he yawned he crawled into Speedy’s lap drawing a surprised look from him. Since his son had made his mad dash from his arms he hadn’t attempted to get back into them. Lexxie rubbed his eyes.

              “I’m sweepy daddy. Can you and Papa H. Tuck me in?” He asked cutely, drawing cooes from the female population. Horatio smiled slightly as Speed looked ready to cry at the request. The older man knew that this was his lover’s first taste at fatherhood, and it was most likely just hitting him fully what he was to the little boy.

              “Sure thing kiddo.” He replied for his boyfriend, when it looked like the other was unable to speak. Speed just nodded, and stood up, supporting his son’s body like a pro as they moved down the hall. They found Lexxie’s room pretty quickly and Horatio watched as his… step-son was changed into his pajama’s and tucked into bed. He reached over and turned on a nightlight as Speed pressed a kiss to the sleepy child’s head.

              “You come and get me if you have a bad dream baby. Alright?” Speed murmured, his voice thick. It was clear that he wanted to be there for every bad dream and hurt his son may ever have again. Lexxie hesitated for a moment, more than enough for Horatio to understand what was going on. Speed was his parent, and he probably was wary about going to his room after his experiences with his mother. They were defiantly going to have to get him to talk about that, but that was for a later time. Right now his stepson needed his sleep and Speed needed to decompress after the day that he had. He could see the tension lining his lover’s body and knew that his son was the only thing holding him together at the moment. Speed wanted to be strong for him.

               “Neither of us will have a problem with it kiddo, and you won’t be interrupting anything because you come first.” He assured the still silent child. He was staying the night here, but not just because Speed was. This was his stepson’s first night out of the hospital and he’d been planning to stick around for him before they got the news on Speed. The four year old looked at him with too intelligent eyes before nodding.

              Speed looked devastated as he realized what had just happened. His son had been afraid to come to him because he thought that he was going to be like his mother. He just wished that woman was alive so he could have made her pay for the damage she had inflicted on his child. He kissed his son’s head again, before situating himself into the small bed, curling around him. Lexxie looked at him with wide eyes as he did this and he smiled at his son.

            “I know that your mummy wasn’t the most welcoming, but I need your promise that if you ever need anything big or small, hug or cuddle that you’ll come to me or Papa H alright? We will never mind, or turn you away because you’re our baby boy and you are important and deserve every ounce of love and attention we could ever give you. And soon Uncle Tony will come when I call him and he’ll bring lots of presents because you’re his nephew and he has spoiling privileges.” He murmured quietly and calmly, although he was feeling anything but calm. Lexxie cuddled into him after a second, his small arms wrapping around his father’s neck firmly.

            “Don’t go ever.” He whispered. Speed’s eyes closed, as tears started building up and he shook his head.

            “I will never leave you kiddo. Cross my heart.” He vowed. Lexxie nodded, yawning again as his green eyes closed slowly. He had a big day today and it was catching up to him. After a couple minutes his breathing was deep and even and Speed looked at his lover. He was still crying although it was silent. Horatio sat down in the chair next to him and started rubbing his arm. He knew Speed wasn’t going to move from his position for a while, and he didn’t blame the other man. Their child was a lot like him, with the ability to mask his emotions, but underneath the bravado he was a scared 4 year old who had been locked in a cupboard while his mother was murdered.

            “It’s going to be alright Speed. I promise you.” Horatio murmured after a moment. Sped shook his head.

            “I can never make up for what he went through H. Never.” He replied bitterly. Horatio didn’t know what to say to that, so he didn’t speak. Instead he just sat with his lover and their sleeping son thankful that he had them both in his life. There was a scent of change in the air that much was for sure.


	8. Arrivals and Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 0.o This story hasn't been updated in a while now has it?..... Those bad bunnies and life just seemed to get in the way- but I do have good news! My wedding went perfect! No wait that's not what you wanted to hear. What you want to hear is that I've finally got an update right? Well guess what? I do and here it is. I hope it's up to par! read and Enjoy Luvs!

          Tony was dead tired as the red-eye to Miami landed, but he wasn’t going to go to sleep anytime soon. Not until he saw Tim with his own two eyes and made sure that his brother was safe and alive- before giving him a piece of his mind over his latest adventure. Gibbs’ hand was heavy in his arm as he guided him off the plane, a supportive weight telling him that he was there for him and he couldn’t ask for more really. He was more than physically exhausted right now- Tim had to quit dying on him and the stupid government goons who kept faking his death needed to back off. Tim wasn’t a child anymore- he had people who could protect him in his life. People who would be more than happy to beat the face of whatever jackass wanted to hurt him

  
          “Where are we heading Tony? You didn’t exactly explain that, when you said we were coming to Miami.” Jethro asked as he hailed a cab. Tony groaned as he realized that he hadn’t really said anything before dragging his lover across country. Not about their destination anyways. God knows he had vented about Tim and the stunts that his brother kept pulling and the people in his life, but not where they were going right that second.

  
          “Alexandrea Wood’s house. That’s where Fornell told me Tim was staying anyways.” He told Gibbs, before rattling off the address to the cab driver. He leaned into his lover as the car started moving and Gibbs pressed a kiss to his head, wrapping an arm around him comfortingly. Tony’s eyes drifted closed as he tried to relax and calm himself down before he saw his brother. Since Fornell had dropped the bomb about Tim, and his nephew he had been wound tighter than a damned spring and he knew that wasn’t good for him.

  
          “You do know that it’s going to be alright, right Tony? Your brother is safe and alive.” Gibbs murmured gruffly as he almost drifted off to sleep. Tony nodded sleepily. He knew Cain wouldn’t let Tim out of his sights for a long time after this stunt. And Tim had little Alex to think about now.  Surely his nephew would keep his trouble friendly brother out of the line of fire with just the fact that he needed his father alive. He snorted at the thought- That was a pipe dream considering that trouble seemed to delight in following Tim around. Alex was going to need all the help he could get if Tim kept up his pattern of getting himself ‘killed’.

  
          He did know one thing though. Pulling this crap when one didn’t have a kid was one thing. But now that Tim had a son who depended on him he should take more care of himself. Because if this happened again Tony was clearing out the guest room at Jethro’s because he wouldn’t have his nephew going through life wondering if his father was really dead or not. And he would be letting Tim know that. After what Alex had been through he needed to stability- he needed to know the people he depended on were there for the long run.

  
          Jethro ran a hand through his hair at the noise he made and he closed his eyes. They had their own shares of ups and downs over the years- who hadn’t, but in the end he knew that he would kill for the man he loved, and that Jethro would do the same for him. He had no doubt Caine felt the same way about his brother, but he had a feeling that Tim was going to do his damndest to sabotage himself in this. Living his life the way he had, had done a real number to his brother self confidence. He wasn’t gong to just believe Caine still wanted him and that was going to be one hell of a situation for his nephew. Alex already knew Caine- had known Caine. Speed was the new man in the equation and that would be disconcerting for his brother in all honesty. Speed was going to dive head first into being a father, and he might find himself a bit in the deep end. Or Tony could be worrying about nothing and his brother could have matured with this last bought of death he’d caught. He hoped so for Alex’s sake.

  
           He hadn’t noticed that he’d drifted off to sleep even though he had been sure it wouldn’t happen, until Jethro was shaking him awake and he noticed the big house that he’d visited twice over the years. The porch light was on and as he approached the door with Jethro and their luggage the door opened and a smiling African American woman welcomed them inside. He smiled tiredly at Alexx Woods and she shook her head at them playfully, grinning widely.

  
         “Speedy, and Lexxie are out like lights, so is Horatio. I had a feeling that someone would be notifying you that your brother was still among the living though. The guest room’s made up for you already. And who’s this Tony?” She greeted, hugging Tony tightly. Against his will he found himself relaxing into the woman, he could totally get why Speed had adopted her as his mom. She was freaking awesome. He blushed as she pointed Jethro out though. He hadn’t been exactly sharing at Speed’s funeral. Too caught up in the fact that he thought he was burying his brother he guessed. He looked over to his lover- who’s eyes were sparkling.

  
         “Alexx, this is Jethro. He’s my-” He started only to pause. He hadn’t exactly discussed how he was going to introduce his lover to people. Back home they kept label’s out of it. There was still too much prejudice around their line of work and Jethro was a Marine. His lover grinned and he felt Alexx shaking with silent laughter.

  
         “I’m his lover. Relax Tony, from what you told me this is your brother’s mother figure, and she can’t be as bad as your father. And you’re brother has a lover of his own so I doubt she has a problem.” He announced, murmuring the last part to Tony. Alexx hugged him just a little more tightly, before letting him go.

  
         “It’s nice to meet you Jethro. I know Tony here wasn’t mentioning something at the funeral. And Tony, you shouldn’t be afraid of my reaction. You’re Speedy’s brother, which means your mine just like he is. Now let’s get the two of you to bed. You can surprise the others in the morning, but it’s too late for anything right now. And I want a chance for Speedy to get some rest. He looked about as dead on his feet as you do when he got here. And that was before he found out about Lexxie.” She lecture quietly, already moving then towards her guest room. Tony chuckled under his breath. He didn’t know how he had missed the fact that Alexx had adopted him too.

  
          He barely spoke to her before Tim had ‘died’ and had only called once or twice since. He supposed that would have to change now that he knew of course. When they got to the guest room Alexx hugged him again, before pressing a kiss to his cheek and looking at Jethro. After a second she hugged the older man too, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Tony watched his lover’s face bemusedly- his mind connecting the fact that since Jethro was involved with Tony and she had claimed Tony as her son too just now that she had also claimed Jethro.

  
        “Now you two better get some sleep before morning. Or I will stoop to locking you in the room. We don’t need tempers flying from lack of sleep.” She ordered sternly. Tony snickered, because he could imagine her having done that to his brother. Speed was not the type of person to operate well on little sleep. He sobered as she turned though. While looking in on Tim was out of the questioned he kinda wanted to see his nephew. Lexxie had been abused severely from what he understood, and he wanted to make sure he was alright. That and get any gut reactions he may have to his condition out of the way before officially meeting him. It wouldn’t do to scare Lexxie by acting like an idiot and flying off the handle right away. There would be plenty of time for that later.

  
         “Do you think I could look in on my nephew?” He asked, voicing his thoughts. She looked at him closely, before smiling gently, a look of understanding in her eyes. Even Jethro stood at attention and Tony had to remind himself that his lover had been a father himself. Knowing that a child connected to his partner had been abused hadn’t been a pleasant piece of news to the older man. He had seen it in his lover demeanor when he filled him in on the plane. And he knew Jethro would do everything in his power to make sure that little boy never experienced anything bad again. Alexx motioned for them to follow her, before pausing at another door.

  
         “Just be quiet you two. No matter what you initially feel. This is his first night sleeping here, and I’d rather not have the poor baby startled awake. He’s smaller than a boy of his age should be- just a warning. Most of the bruising has faded though. I understand you wanting to get this first look out of the way before he can see your reaction though. I was the one who pulled the poor baby out of the cupboard and I don’t think i’ll ever forget the way he looked myself.” She murmured softly, before pushing open the door. A night light lit up the room- it was brighter than anything he had seen in a child’s room before, but when Jethro stiffened his eyes were drawn to the small figure of the bed and he brought his hand up to his mouth to muffle any sounds that may escape.

  
        His nephew was tiny, like a doll lying there on his bed, and he was curled into a ball beneath the blankets. Half of them had been kicked off, proving that he hadn’t slept that well so far. Jethro startled him by actually moving towards the bed. With practiced motions he untangled the blankets without waking the small child, settling them back over him. Tony watched his heart aching for the wife and child Jethro had lost and for the child he was attending to. There was no excuse for the was Lexxie’s mother had treated him. He thought the gig was up when his nephew suddenly made a noise, but Jethro dropped to his knee and started murmuring in a low soothing voice, his hand stroking the sleeping child’s hair and miraculously his nephew calmed. His lover got comfortable there on the floor without a second thought and he heard Alex giggle softly behind him.

  
        “That man was a father once upon a time.” He heard her breath. He turned away from the scene he was looking at and tugged Alexx out of the room. It felt wrong to have her watching this no matter if she had adopted his family as hers or not. She didn’t protest as he shut the door, leaving his lover to have his moment with their nephew. He looked at her, his eyes serious and she stilled, frowning slightly.

  
       “Jethro lost his daughter when she was nine. Kelly and his wife were killed to prevent his wife from testifying at a trial.” He informed her softly. Alexx eyes softened, then went to the door, a small smile starting to spread across her lips after a few moment. He tilted his head, wondering what she was thinking.

  
        “Our little boy is going to have a hell of a lot of people who would die for him in a heart beat. Don’t worry, Lexxie likes having family. He’s already adopted the lab as aunts and uncles. You two though. You’re going to be special to him, mark my words.” She finally clued him in. They looked into the room after another couple of minutes, and Jethro was still talking to Lexxie in that low murmur, soothing whatever had been bothering him. Tony’s lips twitched- Lexxie already had Jethro wrapped around his little fingers and he didn’t even have to be awake to do it. He walked over to his lover and softly touched his shoulder. When Jethro looked at him his eyes were blazing and Tony knew that if anything ever happened to Speed Jethro would be the one cleaning the guest room out. He motioned to the door with his head- indicating that they should leave and Jethro’s lips tightened.

  
         “He might start having another nightmare.” Jethro rumbled under his breath and Tony sighed.

  
         “Then Speed will come in. We both need to get some sleep tonight- because I don’t think even Alexx here has enough coffee to make you human if you pull an all nighter. Lexxie will be fine, and I would be surprised if Speed or Caine didn’t check in on him themselves soon.” He replied back, his voice soft so he wouldn’t wake their nephew. Jethro glared a little, but slowly eased himself up off the floor. He looked over the small boy, before bending and brushing a kiss over his forehead gently, and tucking the blankets in around his chin.

  
         “Sleep well Kiddo.” he heard Jethro murmur, before they left the room. Alexx smiled at them, before they returned to their room. Tony heard her enter her own room as he closed the door quietly. Jethro was sitting on the guest bed, staring at him. He moved over to the other man when he noticed the tears gathering at the corners of the gray haired man’s eyes. Jethro hugged him tightly as soon as he touched him and he felt him shudder.

  
        “No child deserves that Tony.” He heard the gruff, muttered words, and closed his own eyes- fighting back his emotions. You could tell Lexxie had been through hell just looking at him. He pressed a kiss into Jethro’s hair, trying to get himself together and knowing his lover was in his own personal hell. Cases with kids always affected him, but this kid was family. And they both knew that. He took a breath, gathering his thought.

  
         “No they don’t. But Lexxie has us now. And we won’t let anything like that happen to him again. And we will make sure he gets past what happened. Now we need to get to sleep, so we can meet him properly in the morning and make sure we’re his favorite uncles okay?” He replied. Jethro inhaled shakily.

  
       “I don’t know if I’m going to be able to sleep to be completely truthful. Not when I can’t stop thinking about the fact that he’s alone in that room and that abused children know how to be quiet when they are upset. You saw his bed, he’s not sleeping well and your brother isn’t there to sooth him.” He responded, a little bit of anger in his voice. He sighed. Jethro couldn’t blame Speed for not anticipating this. It was his brother’s first time being a father, and one could only take the intellectual part of how abused children acted so far.

  
       “I’m not going to make excuses, but I will point out that my brother isn’t that good with kids in the first place. And it’s the first night he’s known he’s a father. He'll catch on, so you can’t blame him for messing up this once. I’ll tell you what. You’re a light sleeper on the best of days. Keep an ear open, and if he starts having problems and no one comes then I give you permission to camp out with him. But until then we are laying down and trying to get some sleep. I wasn’t kidding about the coffee Jethro.” He responded. His lover grunted, before letting him go. They both got ready for bed, and he knew Jethro was listening for any sound from their nephew even as they laid down on the bed. Tony swung an arm around Jethro and closed his eyes- letting the exhaustion take over and drag him under sleeps spell. As he fell asleep he felt Jethro’s arms surround him and smiled.

  
         Sleeping like the dead aside, even he woke up at a high pitched cry several hours later. He felt Jethro stiffen, and prepared himself to move to let the other man up and out of the bed, but then they both heard doors opening outside the room. He heard his brother’s voice next, cooing Lexxie’s name and then the little boy’s sobs. Jethro relaxed, holding him tightly as they listened to the other man comforting their nephew. His lover completely relaxed when they heard Speed tell Lexxie he was going to sleep with him though. And then, a little later they were both asleep once again. And they slept through until the morning, because Lexxie didn’t wake up crying again, safe with his father.


	9. Ponies and Brotherly Talks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: So, it's been a while. A long time in fact, since my last update mentioned my wedding. Wow. Since then I've gotten pregnant- went through a hard pregnancy, almost died giving birth, and now have a 10 month old son keeping me on my toes daily. Writing is now something that happens during naps times that I'm not cleaning the house on, and late, late nights that I feel in the morning, But I want my readers to know I haven't tossed the towel in on any of my stories. I know I specialize in WIP's- that's how my mind works- it bounces from idea to idea and back again and I personally feel a tale is never finished. But I hope you guys stick with me. It might take me a while- but there will always be another chapter just waiting to come out :P

        Timothy Speedle woke up to two things the next morning. His son, who had a nightmare the night before and had ended up sleeping the rest of the night firmly cuddled in between H and him, was no longer in bed with them, and there was a loud, boisterous laughter coming from somewhere in the house. He looked over to H, who was still asleep somehow, and decided that the red-head could sleep in some more- he wouldn’t be waking him up no matter how appealing a good morning kiss sounded to him. His lover couldn’t have been sleeping well before this if he was still out after all that noise out there. Speed made a note to himself to keep an eye on H. The red head was stubborn enough to out on a good show of thing even if he was at the end of his rope.

  
         Tim pointedly ignored the fact that the some thing could be said about him too as he climbed out of bed, and started wandering towards the noise. It sounded like Alex had company- and to Speed’s half awake mind that meant that his team had probably come back over as soon as the sun had made it’s daily appearance. It made sense, given they were close to Lexxie, and Tim was here himself. So it was with that thought in mind that he entered Alexx’s Kitchen, only to stop as he saw his younger brother, and Tony’s boss Gibbs. Huh, so he didn’t have to call Tony and break the news of his survival after all. Well that made his life a little easier.

  
        Tony was currently laying on the floor with Speed’s 4 year old son straddling his back pouting at the exhausted looking man. It looked like Lexxie had been riding on his uncle’s back- like the man was was his personal pony- and Tony had finally collapsed in mock exhaustion. Gibbs had a grin on his normally stern face, and Alexx was giggling as she snapped photo’s. Tim grinned despite himself as he leaned against the nearest wall to watch them. It was good to see that his brother and son were getting along, he had a feeling he would be seeing a lot more of Tony now in fact. Lexxie poked Tony’s head suddenly, tired of waiting for his ride to get back up.

  
       “You’s not sleeping are you? Cause you pwomised to be pony till daddy and papa got done being sweepy.” The small boy whined, Tony groaned, and made to get up- only to be stopped when Tim chuckled, too amused to keep quiet any longer.

  
        “I guess it’s a good thing I’m up now isn’t it? Papa H is still being sleepy, but I think we can handle hanging out without him for a little bit.” Tim announced, pushing off of the wall. Immidiatly all eyes were on him, and he shrugged. “I followed the squeals and laughter. Hey Tone, sorry for putting you through that again.” He explained, adding in his apology before Tony could start in on him. Tony sat up once Gibbs had scooped Lexxie off his back and settled the small boy onto his hip in a practiced move. Tim made note of the fact that Tony’s boss had been a father or favorite uncle without meaning to as his brother looked at him. Tony sighed, looking older then Tim remembered for a moment as he took in the sight of his brother, living.

  
          “We’ll be talking about it, and your habit of being declare dead later Speed. Right now I need some water, and a break from the little horse rider that Gibbs and I will be stealing if you ever pull that stunt again.” He replied, getting up from the ground with a groan. Tim winced, knowing that Tony wasn’t very happy with him, and resisted the urge to bristle at the bold threat of taking his son if he ever ended up ‘dead’ again. He knew Tony was only thinking of Lexxie, but now that he knew he had a son he would really have to be dead to be separated from him.

  
           “Point taken. So you brought your Boss man as back-up to prove your point?” He joked, wondering just why the other man was here with Tony. The last Tim remembered hearing about the older man was that he was a hard ass, a hot hard ass, but a hard ass all the same. Tony blushed at his question, as Gibbs smirked.

  
        “Eh. Not so much on the back-up part. Though he does fit the emotional support bill pretty well. Tim, meet Jethro Gibbs- my Boss man… and my Lover. What can I say, I follow after my big brother when it comes to going after my boss I guess. I mean you bagged your red head and mine likes red heads? Uh, help me out here Gibbs, I’m babbling, and this is only going to get worse.” Tony chatted, words flowing forth in a manner that told Tim he was nervous about coming out with the relationship. Tim blinked as he listened to his brother stumble over his words, and Lexxie giggle as Gibbs Just raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

  
          “Doesn’t sound like you need any help telling it like it is DiNozzo. You are amusing Sir Lexxie here though so I think I’ll let you keep going.” Gibbs hummed. Tim smirked at his brother’s lover. He was going to like the older man, he just knew it. Gibbs was different from the sort that Tony normally went after, the kind of different that made his older brother think that this might last the long haul. Given that neither man messed it up in any way. Tony whined, glaring at his lover as her looked at him with a pout.

  
         “No fair, you’re supposed to stop me when I work up a babble. I embarrass myself when I do that.” The youngest DiNozzo protested. Tim snorted. He didn’t think there was a force in the world that could save Tony from himself once he got worked up- and from the look on Gibbs’ face the other man agreed with him. Yep, he could see himself getting along with his younger brother’s other half just fine. Lexxie laid his small head on said man’s shoulder- shooting looks at his father and uncle as he watched them interact. Tim shot him a smile before focusing on Tony. While he knew they had a lot to talk about he could deal with just dealing with the small stuff for now. He didn’t want to get into any conversations that might bring about yelling with Lexxie around. He might not know much about his son yet, but the boy’s reaction to Eric’s playful smack yesterday was still bright in his mind.

  
          “I think Gibbs knows there’s no way to stop you from embarrassing yourself Tone. So when did he move from a hot hard ass to your lover?” He asked slyly, with a playful smirk on his face. The smirk widened as his brother sputtered, looking at Gibbs, then Tim and back again. Gibbs’ had an eyebrow raised- but not at Tony. At the slightly disapproving look Tim had to wonder what he had done wrong. It wasn’t until Lexxie spoke up that he understood the reaction though- and he could have kicked himself.

  
          “What’s a hard ass?” His little boy chirped- tilting his head as he tried to puzzle out the phrase. Tim groaned as Alexx snorted. He had to learn to watch his mouth, he had a 4 year old, who apperently parroted what he heard. Then again if he remembered anything about children that was normally how things went.

  
         “It’s not something for your to say buddy. It’s a very adult way of saying someone is tough. But little Sir Lexxies shouldn’t say it. Okay?” Tony spoke up when Tim couldn’t find a way to try to explain to his son what he had said, and why the little boy shouldn’t repeat it. Alexx rolled her eyes as she walked towards her pantry.

  
          “I swear to god I didn’t think I’d need a swear jar this early on.” Tim heard her muttered, and he felt his own face heat up at that. He knew he had a hell of a lot to learn about being a parent, and it looked like his family would be getting front row seats to it. But he’d only known he was a fathe rless than 24 hours, so he should get some sympathy and leway for goodness sake. Gibbs was giving his a hard look still, and Tim scratched out favorite uncle from his observation. That man had a child of his own at one time, and he wasn’t as impressed with Tim, as Tim was with him. And as much as it made him defensive Tim understood. Gibbs was in love with his brother, and Tim had ‘died’ on him twice now- causing the younger man untold amounts of emotional pain. That alone put Tim in the doghouse with his brother in law (or would be brother in law) and marked him as an unreliable element in Tony’s life, but as a father himself Gibbs was also judging him on how he was handling and adjusting to Lexxie.

  
         And it looked like he was failing, or that was the way Gibbs’ stare was making him feel. Tony suddenly shot his lover a look and the glare settled into a hard look, as if Tim’s younger brother was telling him to reign it in without speaking. Tim nodded his head in the other man’s direction. He knew that this situation was messed up, and that he was facing having to prove himself, but he could and would make sure that by the time Tony and Gibbs’ left that they didn’t feel the need to question if he was going to be a good father to Lexxie, and if he was going to ‘die’ and leave the little boy alone. Not that he would be alone if something ever happened. H would take him home in a heartbeat and Alexx had already taken him in once.

  
          “Are you boys playing nice out here?” Alexx asked, coming back into the room with a mason jar. She pointedly looked at Tim, Tony and Gibbs in turn as she set the jar down on the counter. Lexxie nodded, looking at his favorite grandma to see what she had brought in- seemingly unaffected by what had just passed between the adult. Tim didn’t bother hiding a grin. Nightmares aside his son had seemed to have adjusted well to the change in his life. As the little boy wiggled Gibbs lowered him to the ground and went to stand next to Tony as said little boy bolted towards his grandmother. Alexx spared them a look before shooing them as she picked up Lexxie and settle him on a stool as she gathered some craft items. When they didn’t move she rolled her eyes.

  
         “Why don’t you boys go have a chat while Lexxie and I decorate this swear jar? I know you need to clear the air on somethings, and that’s best done before the others show up.” shedirected pointedly. Tim looked at her before sighing. He did need to talk with Tony now that he was here, but he really didn’t know what he was going to say. On one one hand he had followed the WitSec protocols because he hadn’t wanted to risk getting Tony orH involved in the mess he’d stumbled into, but he knew they had been and were still capable of protecting themselves. And even knowing that he had let them think he was dead for 3 years. And after Tony having already gone through this once with him, he wasn’t looking forward to the aftermath of the second time.

  
         “Understood. Lexxie, if you need me don’t hesitate in coming to me. Or if you don’t want to interrupt you can go wake up Papa H.” He instructed his child, not wanting to just leave him in Alexx’s care without a word. Lexxie grinned at him, nodding before turning back to the paper and sparkles that Alexx had gotten out. With a small grin Tim turned back to his brother and Gibbs and motioned to the patio. They might as well enjoy the cool morning air before the heat of the afternoon took hold and had them scurrying for the AC inside.

  
          “After you.” He directed, trying to control the feeling that he was walking into a dressing down. One that he deserved, but a dressing down all the same. Tony grinned at him, his eyes sparkling merrily before all but bouncing out of the house, with his lover following him at a slower pace. Tim rolled his eyes before wishing that he’d woken up his own lover when he had the chance and following them out. It was better to get this over with then to have it hanging over his head while he avoided it. He wasn’t his father after all.

* * *

  
        “So, why the hell didn’t you at least call me? I’m not some idiot that would go announcing to the world that my dead brother was still in fact alive.” Tony asked with a dangerous note in his voice as soon as the patio door closed. Gibbs moved past the brothers and settled near the edge of the patio- not looking at them but Tim knew that he was listening. He sighed, rubbing his face before looking a this brother.

  
        “I’ve asked myself why I didn’t call H or you a million times Tone. I was out of it for weeks though, after the shooting, and by the time I was even aware of what had happened you all had buried me. I was hurt, alone in a new place, and I knew I had someone after me again. I fell back into the mindset of the first time around. If I didn’t call you guys, then I wouldn’t chance endangering you. And knowing that you’d already buried me- or rather a body that looked like me didn’t help any either. I knew what you’d gone through the first time around, when there wasn’t a body. I knew that I was in no shape to pull a runner right then, and I was being watched pretty closely in case I decided to get a burner and call. After the survelliance let up I just tried to pretend I was Tony Riddle, science teacher, and keep my head down while they went after the assholes they needed to take down” he replied, not bothering to try to make excuses. He shouldn't have put them through 3 years of thinking he was dead when he wasn’t- plain and simple. Tony snorted, before drawing him into a tight hug.

  
        “So you were stupid, over thinking, and reprogrammed into the WitSec paranoia of “keep silent and your loved ones live”. I’m a big boy now Timothy, and please don’t get me wrong but if you ever got into that situation again- your making or someone else’s- that little boy in there is moving in with Gibbs and I. He doesn’t deserve having his father die only to come back alive over and over again. He needs you alive, and he needs stability.” Tony muttered into his shoulder. Tim stiffened at the warning that his brother once again gave him. He knew Tony was being serious, and that he was in the right, but the thought of losing Lexxie scared him. Even though he had just met the little boy last night he already loved him and with the FBI’s annoying habit of killing him off without warning he couldn’t promise that this wouldn’t happen again. That made him angry both at himself and the world in general.

  
         “You’ll have to fight H for him. He loves Lexxie.” Tim bit out in reply, hugging Tony back even though he was upset. Tony snorted, patting his back as he pulled away to look at Tim in the eyes.

  
         “That kid’s worth fighting for. Now that we got the emotional stuff out of the way, how have you been? I know you were just about dead when they took you into the program- Fornell told me that much before I beat the crap out of him.” He asked, stepping away from the hug. Tim raised an eyebrow at his younger brother.

  
         “You beat up a fed over him being the delivery boy of my survival? Good for you. And shouldn’t I be the one asking how you’ve been? I kinda am the older brother here.” He shot back, not really wanting to go over the last three years. His recovery had been long and hard, and his emotional state after that hadn’t been the best. He had been depressed to say the least. He had been in a podunk town , without his lover, friends or family and while he was sure that he would have to talk about it before he was cleared to go back to work today was just too soon. With coming back and finding out about Lexxie he just wanted a few days before he laid himself bare. Tony gave him a hard look, as if he knew that Tim didn’t want to talk and it wouldn’t be pretty.

  
      “Only in age. I feel like emotionally I’m the older brother here Tim. Just like I’m pretty sure you haven’t been the best while you were hidden away. You will talk to me about it some day. As for me. I’d lost my older brother and I couldn’t really do or say anything about it because you never officially exited WitSec the first time around. It was tough, but Gibbs got me through most of it, even if he didn’t know what he was helping me through. He’s good for that.” He finally replied, motioning at the older man, who had turned to watch the brothers.

  
      “If I had known, I would have done some digging. People who hurt my family don’t have a long shelf life and then you would have had the chance to come home sooner then this. I think I’ll be having my own words with Fornell. I have no doubt he knew about the case before he had to tell Tony about you being alive, and we’ll leave that at that. Your son is watching us and it looks like your H has finally gotten up.” Gibbs added in, Tim turned to look inside the house and watched as Lexxie was swung up from his stool and onto Horatio’s hip- the little boys squeal of delight audible through the door. The father couldn’t resist the smile that crosses his face at the sight.

  
       “Looks like we should go inside before H thinks you two brought me out to beat me with the proverbial rubber hose.” Tim hummed, nodding to H as he looked out onto the Patio after Alexx said something to him. H raised an eyebrow and he shook his head, moving towards the door.

  
        “Alright them. Gibbs and I have plenty of free time, so we’ll break out the hoses next chat if we have to.” Tony teased, following him as Gibbs just grunted.


End file.
